THE DATE SERGEANT

I ran across something yesterday that I just feel the need to discuss today. It's about a profile of someone on an online dating site who had clicked they wanted to meet me (and that's about where the positive ended). I'd get up on my soapbox about it but apparently someone's seen fit to hide it from me. Go figure. Anyway, as I was saying...

I was perusing a segment entitled "Wants to meet you" on an online dating site. When I clicked on that person's profile at first it was looking good... Non-smoker - check, age appropriate - check (meaning he's too old to be my son and too young to be my father), nice picture - check.  Wow, 3 for 3. Then I just had to do it, I just had to read the whole profile. Here's where the wheels fell off.

Guys (and gals) if you want someone who's positive, may I suggest not using words like 'don't' and 'not' and 'never' over 12 times EACH?! I'm serious, the more I read, the funnier and sadder it got all at the same time.  Funny because he apparently wanted someone positive but had nothing but negative on there and sadder because from the looks of it he may have the potential to be a good guy. From what I read, I bet he'd make a great drill sergeant. But I don't want to go out with someone where I'm waiting to hear a whistle blast and him screach "Wrong fork... That'll be five laps... Move, move, move!" 

So, when I'm reading a profile of someone who is telling me and everybody else who read it what NOT to do and say and act and write well then here's my list: DON'T bother to check your inbox as there's NOT a chance in hell I'll be there and NEVER omit the positive if you're looking for it.