THAT WAS YOUR 'ICE BREAKER'?

Yep, I’m at it again.  While my friends have been surfing the web since Black Friday for shoes, electronics, toys (for their kids) and even jewelry, I’ve been using it to net a different sort of gem. And boy have I seen some doozies and floozies!

Having had a couple of days now to reflect on the events of last week has given me a much better perspective on things… not to mention more writing ammo! No, I CAN’T help it – not when what some of you guys send is so bad that for me it’s like shooting fish in a barrel.

And, as for some of your opening lines well let’s just say that you want to be careful what you write to break the proverbial ice – you could end up going through it instead! I mean really – whose bright idea was it to send someone you don’t know a message that actually read “Hey, I really liked your ‘pic’ so I thought I'd write to break the ice. I was wondering how you would look in Victoria’s Secret rather than jeans. Honestly I wonder how you’d look out of Victoria’s Secret?” Really? You write something like that as an ice breaker and don't expect me to use it as a 'something else' breaker? Then by all means keep writing... I'm taking notes! 

On the up side, after what happened last week, I needed a different sort of a ‘pick-me-up’ (no not the 2 am lights on at the bar kind thank you very much). I honestly was just looking for giggles and grins and, like a Disney movie, considering the messages like the one I just told you about, the computer didn’t let me down. What’s that? Did I answer that one? What do YOU think? Ummm. NO!!

And while we're on the subject of 'shopping'... if there’s one thing I can put on your level in the context of the holiday shopping season it’s this: we’re NOT ‘Toys R Us’. We’re not here for you to take off the shelf in Aisle 8, only to handle us for a bit then toss us back on any old shelf in Aisle 10, because you just found the newest doll!

Seriously, that Victoria’s Secret doll you just picked up may be cute but odds are her idea of camping out is the Ritz Hotel without hot water. You realize the cost of that stay is about the equivalent of a downpayment on that bass boat you’ve been eyeing?... And in rough wake, you know you can count on that boat!